Is forgiveness easy for you, or is it a long, drawn-out affair?
“Quick to forgive.”
Nothing challenges a Christian more than the ability to forgive quickly.
We seem to build a case against someone’s character or personality. The further removed we are from the incident that offended us, the whole thing gets bigger and uglier in our minds
How do you honestly get over an offense? Is forgiving and forgetting the same thing?
Try these steps to change your perspective of an offense:
Make room for people to change.
The Prodigal Son’s older brother was convinced that his younger brother was a “jerk.” He left home with a considerable amount of money and blew it all.
The day the son returned home, however, was a day of celebration for the Dad. The brother, however, refused to go to the party.
Can you make room that God has put someone through a process of change that has genuinely resulted in them being different?
2. Satan loves to keep someone unaccepted.
Paul had to ask the Corinthian church to remove a man who had an immoral affair in the church. They obeyed and put him out of the church.
The man repented of his sin and sought restoration. The church could not forgive him. Paul said, “We are not ignorant of Satan’s devices” (2 Cor. 2: 11).
Satan’s goal is to keep a person outside of forgiveness forever. They can enter into depression, defeat, and discouragement. Why not “spring the trap” of the enemy and restore someone who has truly repented?
3. Is your record perfectly clear?
When we refuse to forgive, we say we have no issues. As someone said, “If you think you have no issues, that’s your issue right there!”
To the Galatian church, Paul said to “restore someone in the spirit of meekness, LOOKING TO YOURSELF lest you also be tempted.” (Galatians 6: 1).
Remind yourself of your shortcomings. If you feel “perfect,” don’t deceive yourself! Jesus told us that if we could not forgive others, our Father would also not forgive us for our failures.
4. Don’t wait until you “forget.”
The heart is where forgiveness happens. The mind is where memories can remain for a long time.
Neuroscientists tell us that memories are “trees” in our brains filled with images, words, and voices. When you recall an offense, all those feelings come racing back.
Only God can “clear the tree.” It will take time. Just because you can still recall the hurt feelings does not mean you have not “legally” forgiven a person in your heart for their offense.
5. Forgiveness sets YOU free
When you forgive someone, you are the one who will enjoy freedom!
There is nothing worse than a sour, polluted well of offense. You feel chained to that offense.
Set yourself free! Refuse to be bound by someone else’s actions.
Say it out loud, “I forgive, from my heart, the offense of _________ against me.”
You just started your journey of personal freedom!