Want to know the secret to all relationships? “Little things add up”

Why do we think the homerun, the buzzer-beater shot, the rooftop proposal, or landing the big contract are all that matter?

They DO matter.

But not as much as the little things that got you to that big moment.

In some basketball practices, icon coach John Wooden taught his players how to tie their shoes for 90 minutes!  Why?  To keep them from having a blister in the championship game.

Relationships are no different.  

Here are some little things that make all the difference in your relationships:

1.  Quit thinking that natural things don’t matter.

People have needs, alright?  Some are very practical and very small.  

You have no idea what it means to them that you noticed their little need.  And that you took the time to buy, pick up, or send them that small convenience.

It says, “Your need (however small) is important to me.”

Don’t talk yourself out of it just because it is small.  Look at their smallest need as your greatest opportunity to serve them.

2. Unplug from self-consumption and pampering.

Today’s world gives us thousands of options a day to pamper ourselves.  You can become self-consumed with meeting your own (very small) needs.

Unplug from that world.

Notice the needs of others.  Let yourself be inconvenienced to lend a helping hand at the store, gas station, or in your neighborhood.

Find a small need and meet it every day.

3.  “Little things add up” with your SPOUSE.

Why do marriages dry up?  

On the honeymoon, it is a race to meet a small need!    After the honeymoon (and for years after), we can return to self-consumption.

What practical help does your spouse need? What have they been even asking for help with?  Does it annoy you now because it is such a small, practical help to them?

You’re missing your greatest opportunity to change your marriage.

Meet their practical needs.

Don’t think marriage is about sex, money, and power.

It is the never-ending pursuit of helping your spouse with the practical areas of their life.

You will be amazed at how the other three issues automatically work out.

After 47 years of marriage, I can confidently say that “A successful marriage is when two loving partners continually meet the small, practical needs of their spouse.”

4.  A selfish nation cannot survive.

We find ourselves segmenting into factions.  We don’t associate with “those people,” let alone meet their practical needs.

The Samaritan met the practical needs of a person of a different race than himself.  For a few coins and a little time, he brought the stranger to a warm room with food and medical care.

Jesus said, “He was a neighbor.”

Search for a small practical need you can meet in a stranger or someone down the street.

Bring them a meal.  Trim their hedges when they are traveling.  Listen to their painful story on a plane.

“Little things add up.”

We can change ALL OF our relationships…one practical need at a time.